The Book of COVID
America's recent history as an Old Testament pastiche
This is a reading from the Book of COVID.
For the People had become restless and demanded of THE LORD:
“We, The People, no longer need kings or priests to rule over us. We, The People, will select our own rulers. We will select Godly rulers, who rule by reason, responsibility, and morality, all guided by your Son’s principle of doing unto others.”
And the LORD responded to the People: “You may select your own rulers, and as long as they are Godly rulers, guided by reason, responsibility, and morality, all guided by my Son’s principle of doing unto others, I will bless your Nation above all others. Thus you have my Promise.”
And the Nation feared THE LORD, offering the proper sacrifices to Him while selecting Godly rulers. And the LORD was pleased, blessing this new Nation.
And by keeping with the People’s word, the Nation grew ever more powerful, until it became the mightiest of Nations, developing weapons of fire and thunder which could destroy cities.
The Nation became wealthy beyond compare, more than the lands of Egypt, more than Babylon, more than all the empires of the Earth.
In this way, THE LORD blessed the Nation, for generations on end.
But it came to pass that the praises for the LORD grew ever dimmer, the People turning away from the LORD and their agreement. So it was that in the Third Year of Trump that the LORD visited His great Nation.
And the LORD was angered by what he saw, saying to his angels:
“The People have have given control of nuclear fire to entertainers and money-changers, whoremongers and liars. The People are lost in a marvel of entertainment, deflection, denial, and selfishness. The People rulers are no longer guided by reason, responsibility, and morality.”
Thus, the Lord removed his Promise from the Nation:
“You were to select rulers of reason, responsibility, and morality. But for two whole generations, you have selected leaders who were actors, CIA chiefs, whoremongers, drunkards, elitists, and conmen.
“Let The People know that by this, they will know that I am the LORD: In the Fourth Year of Trump I will test The People by striking them with a plague of such vengeance that they shall wail with lamentation, their wealth diminishing, so they may see the power of the LORD.”
And the LORD smote the Nation with a great Plague, hoping the People and their Rulers would come to reason, responsibility, and morality. As millions of The People accepted the LORD’s gift of science, the Ruler rejected the LORD and His Promise, causing the Nation to suffer more than any other on Earth:
“I don’t take responsibility at all.”
His heart hardened against the leaders rejection of responsibility, the LORD allowed the plague to continue, the nations great wealth, power, and even life, diminishing, for the Ruler and his Followers were continuing to turn away from the LORD and the Promise made to the LORD.
Chastened, the vast majority of the People repented of their sins, saying We, the People, have decided to rid ourselves of the Ruler, replacing him with a man trained in the ways of reason, responsibility, and the morality of Your Son.
However, the Ruler continued to reject the Promise made unto the LORD by attempting to overthrow the great Nation.
But the will of The People thwarted him, and he was cast from power, the People’s will affirmed by the LORD, His Promise made to the Nation restored.
And the LORD was pleased and allowed His heart to soften. And the LORD blessed the people with a vaccine saying:
“I have blessed you with both a Universe which is knowable and the ability to exercise dominion over it. Developed through your science given by my Grace, you have the miracle of the vaccine.
“Take this, all of you, and inject it, for this is my blessing, given up for you.”
And the majority of the Nation’s people rejoiced in the LORD, singing His praises, accepting the vaccine as soon as it was available.
But the Ruler and his Followers hearts remained hardened against the LORD, rejecting the LORD’s gift, speaking lies to it.
The lie… 
The Reality… And his followers turned away from the LORD, saying the Ruler was the new God. And they built golden statues and graven images in the Rulers likeness to worship.
And the LORD’s heart hardened again, the LORD saying:
“The nature of my gift is that the rejection of it means death, not ever-lasting life. The People who kept to their Promise will have my eternal favor. Those who continue to reject My word will not. Let the Ruler’s people deny my gift. By this they assure their own destruction”
This has been a reading from the Book of COVID.